Friday, 11 September 2009

Ever so sweet

I have not blogged in so long.
Well, from my last one, you know I'm obviously in Georgia. I've only seen Kelly once and I miss everyone in England so much. I just want to buy a plain ticket and have a giant party and give everyone bear hugs that last a long time. It makes me so sad. I try to keep listening to happy-ish songs to put me in a better mood but it isn't helping really. It ends up just building up and I just get really sad all at once. It's kinda hard to make legit friends here. I feel like I just follow around a lot of people and a lot of people just stare at me. I keep getting told that "you're attractive and cool, you should have no problem making friends" uh, hello? the way I look has NOTHING to do with my anxiety. :/ and one thing that bugs me the MOST is when people tell me I have no reason to get anixety...?! do you seriously think I can just turn of some sort of anxiety switch or something?! HA I wish. but no, sorry people.I just sounds kind of bitchy. but I'm just's not that easy. It's getting a bit better, but instead of getting anxiety attacks I just kinda get choked up and don't say anything to anyone, and then people just think I'm lame and don't talk. When I'm with Sydney and all them, I'm totally fine, and hanging out with Jeffrey and them is getting a lot better and not so awkward for me. I really enjoy hanging out with Jeffrey and Isaac they are so fun and entertaining to be around and never seize to amaze me, they are my favorite to be around.
OH! I met someone. I'm kind of afraid to like him. I guess if you know what situation I just came out'd know why. I'm ready though. I kind of like him. but....he's always busy and that makes me sad.
Speaking of which, I haven't talked to Bloo in a while, I think it's a good thing. In fact, I think it's a GREAT thing. He said something that kind of upset me, which is nothing new. I just haven't even attempted to talk to him since. (Y)
I miss having people I can talk to about everything. I feel like everyone here already has a best friend, and then when I try to get one, I get blown off or something.
I realized that the majority of the guys that go for me, I would nevvvverrrr go for. ha. I don't really know why I even typed that. but I just always think about that lately. I talked to Kelly about the guys I usually go for....funny conversation...>.<
I think it's hilarious how many people think Bethany and I are related or just look alike. it makes me think of how we used to hate! and I mean HATE! each other, and now I love her to death. I miss her a lot.
Ugh, I feel so inconveniently busy, I wish I could make videos with Juliana again:( I miss summer. I left at such a bad time.
I don't like it when random people ask for my number.
I want Verizon, it's bad to want, but I think I, and everyone who tries to text me and it doesn't work, could agree with me.
mm. I cuddled the other day. mm, I was so happy at that moment!
It's parents weekend, and I see all these parents and I can't see mine. I miss them so much, it makes my heart sad:(! my *says with a little kid English accent* DAAADDDAY (haha) is sending me a package! and I'm so excited to receive it.

hmm. I want someone to sing to me.



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